Ever since discovering at 16 that I don’t have a voice like Whitney and a singing career was not in the cards for me, I’ve been looking for other ways to steal the spotlight. So when my Inbox dinged and notified me of an opportunity to appear on the Isaac Mizrahi show, I was one thousand percent in. The premise was this: I would be attending a cocktail party hosted by Isaac. After chatting with Mr. Mizrahi about cocktail party style, two other ladies and I would storm through his on-set fashion closet (my pura vida) and become transformed and ready for drinks!
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Ludacris and DJ Sway,
Photo Courtesy of Brad Barket,
Getty Images North America

Ludacris brings new meaning to ’shake your money maker’ with the recent release of one of hip-hop magazine XXL’s “Most Anticipated Records of the Year,” Release Therapy. As an in-the-know, ahead-of-the-curve New Yorker, I couldn’t wait any longer to hear the new album and see the man of the hour during the album release party at Lower East Side club Element.

I was schedule to take in Jet concert, promoting their new album Shine On, which Fuse TV’s 7th Avenue Drop recorded on Thursday Sept 29. A friend of mine is the casting director who regularly sneaks me into these events, past events have included The Strokes and Red Hot Chilli Peppers.

When I arrived at the flashy Fuse studio on 34th Street and Seventh Avenue, I spied a line of excited mini-hipsters wrapping around the corner as they waited to pile into the studio and stand within sweat-slinging distance of the rock gods as they performed. Since I don’t like lines (or hipsters), I walked past it all and slipped into the Fuse building. That’s when chaos began.

Here it is. The grand finale of the New York Television Festival. The premiere of Fox’s hostage negotiator show Standoff will be screened in a few minutes, and I’m downstairs within striking distance of Ron Livingston when I begin to envision my own hostage scenario. Do I go all out (or balls out, as it were) and make a grab for Livingston’s goods? Would he talk me down, or would a mini-army of SWAT teamers and PR flacks jump me? I’ll leave the possibilities open and let you all draw up your own crisis management plans.

Lola’s continued coverage of New York Television Festival:

A creamy yogurt bath any time you need it. A manservant always prepared to offer his head for a swiftly kicked soccer ball. An entire room full of colorful, pimptastic hats. According to ABC’s upcoming fall comedy The Knights of Prosperity, these pleasures and more could all be yours if you were Mick Jagger. On the other hand, if you, like the loveable losers who form the Knights, live by more modest means - driving a yellow cab, plumbing Queens toilets or getting axed from your first internship - wouldn’t you be willing to risk it all to rob a rock god?

My little black dress flapping in the breeze and turquoise mother-of-pearl earrings jangling seductively, I stood there on the red carpet and gave Delroy Lindo a chance to soak up my infectious personality. “We’ll keep this light,” I said, thinking,”Surely, he’s tired of talking about his new show.” He responded with an unimpressed “We’ll see how far that goes.”

It seems that Delroy and gonzo journalism don’t mix. When I attended the New York Television Festival opening gala premiere of NBC’s Kidnapped, thinking I would rock the zany questions Ryan Pinkston-on-Punk’d-style and give the stars a refreshing break from the serious reportage of Us Weekly and Access Hollywood, boy, was I wrong.