Damn it, Janet, Rocky is no longer the champ. These days, a new sing-a-long sensation is slaying the nation – it’s Buffy! At the Buffy the Vampire Slayer Sing-A-Long, kazoos, bubbles, streamer explosions and Fabio all add up to an unforgettable evening of homage to the show’s legendary musical episode, “Once More with Feeling.”

When I arrived at the West Village’s IFC Center at 11:20 p.m. (45 full minutes before the screening), about 25 hardcore Whedon enthusiasts were already queued up. Twenty short minutes later, Sing-A-Long Xander, a.k.a. Joshua Ziesel, was passing out (free!) blood-red gift bags with all the tools necessary to enjoy the night—kazoos for the dramatic climax, bunny pencil erasers in honor of Anya’s irrational fear, monster finger puppets, and, of course, vampire teeth.
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For those of us below the 35+ television viewer demographic, Tony Shalhoub is not exactly a household name. Same for Patricia Heaton, though her foray into the world of breast lift surgery was well-documented in the pages of Us Weekly or People a few years ago. Both are immensely talented actors who have racked up multiple Emmys - Shalhoub for his turn as an OCD San Francisco detective Monk, and Heaton for putting up with Ray Romano’s nasal drivel for nine seasons (nine seasons!). But now, my glamour pusses, they are co-starring in The Scene, an Off-Broadway play that merits even the youngsters’ attention.

The holiday season has begun for me, and I know exactly what I want…not that that should be any surprise. I want a nutcracker—but not just any nutcracker. A well-hung, jaw-chiseled, tall nutcracker. My nutcracker needs to dance, have nice posture and speak only when spoken to—except to shush me when I’ve been naughty! He’s out there, and though you may not touch him, you can watch him. He resides at 55 E. 59th St., in the New York Theater Ballet production of The Nutcracker. This isn’t the New York City Ballet and it isn’t at Lincoln Center…but neither is he.

As New York’s night life spots draw me indoors, and my drinks of choice move from a cold imported beer to a smooth, rich red wine, I have to ponder where a city girl can go while staying reasonably warm. It hit me while I floated through various New York blogs. What could be a more perfect winter activity than seeing a play in a cozy, intimate theater? I found an ideal option at the Barrow Street Theatre: Tim Crouch’s two-person play, an oak tree.
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Samantha, Carrie and the girls did it. Now it was my turn. Though I am in no way proclaiming Brooklyn to be “out,” I must admit that it wouldn’t be my first choice to take in a musical extravaganza. I went with fellow Glamourite Lauren to see The Gallery Players perform Urinetown, The Musical, an off-off Broadway performance of the offbeat musical set in a townwhere “Rich folks get the good life…poor folks get the woe!” I was excited to see what The Gallery Players, who are celebrating their 40th anniversary this season, would do with a Tony-winning show about… well… pee.

After watching a contortionist try to fit himself in a 16-inch cube, a mustached nebbish free himself from wrist constraints in 1.47 seconds and a man eat a GE lightbulb, I was roped into an exit interview. I told the interviewer, one of seven magicians convened at Fantasma Magic, “I’ve never seen anything like this before!” Without missing a beat, he exclaimed, “Well, I’ve never seen anything like this before” while pulling out the top of my shirt and taking a gander at the girls. End of interview.